March 14, 2018 – Fashion twin?

         Today’s Dear Abby Column, “Woman irked when co-worker mimics her distinctive style,” caught my attention. I couldn’t help but laugh out loud – LOL – at “One of a Kind” in Illinois who was complaining that she recently lost weight and a grossly obese woman at her place of work is copying the way she dresses.

         Excuse me!  Jeanne Phillips, the columnist, pointed out that it was a form of flattery – you know that age-old line, “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.”

         Let us stand back and look at this situation with clear eyes.  If ‘One of a Kind’ is a size 10 and the grossly obese woman is a size – let’s put it up there – a size 26 – there is something wrong with this picture and this so-called complaint. 

         First. ‘One of a Kind’ might be still dressing in fat women clothes even though she has lost weight.  ‘One of a Kind’ needs to do a serious re-think of her fashion style and her level of self-esteem. Is she still wearing the fat clothes – now cinched in with a belt or taken in by a tailor?  If so – WRONG on her part. She needs new duds and fast.

Second. Where does a size 26 obese woman find clothes that mirror a small size, like a size 10?  I would like to know that myself; please, someone send me an email and tell me where you can find fashionable clothes for the obese.

Third. Does ‘One of Kind’ actually think that clients or fellow workers don’t notice one person is trim and the other is a big blob in the same outfit? Of course they are probably snickering behind their backs at how ridiculous one of these women dresses? Possibly the snickering is rightly directed at ‘One of Kind’ who is not dressed as well as she could be now that she is trim and ‘One of a Kind’ actually knows this subconsciously, but won’t change her style to correct the issue.

Fourth. Possibly the obese woman has such great self-esteem that when she looks in the mirror she thinks she looks just fine, or in fact, lovely as she celebrates enjoying being in her own skin. That is good for her and bad for ‘One of a Kind’.  There is more to life than being a certain dress size.

Fifth. Does ‘One of a Kind’ have the same color hair and eyes, or poise as the person who is copying her?  I doubt it.  Everyone has a different style – a perfect example: three women lead singers – same gowns worn by each, but each so individual that the audience can differentiate which is which.  If this style copier were your twin sister, you could have a legitimate complaint – but me, a layperson, I don’t see your problem.

Lastly. Possibly both ‘One of a Kind’ and obese have taken pages out of the Career Women’s wardrobe primer and they are both wearing classics or in this case, clothes from the fashion place that ‘One of a Kind’ indicates she has worked in for years.

You can’t claim your own individuality of any classic clothing item – like a trench coat, a black suit with a white top, or a classic navy blue dress.  If there is a rack in the store that has a beige trench coat is sizes from one to 30 – you are out of luck trying to claim your own personal fashion statement as you are competing with the world.

I dress like Audrey Hepburn – all the time, but I sure don’t look like Audrey Hepburn because I’ve stolen some basics, a trench coat, the little black dress and black flats. But, dozens of times in my varied work life I have shown up in the conference room and across the table are women with the same color I am wearing.  I use humor, “Oh, we all must have gotten the memo to wear black with cobalt blue today.”  It lightens the mood. Intelligent women, with style and grace don’t wring our hands and cry and moan and pitch a fit over something so mundane.  We admire how good we all look – short, tall, fat, skinny, old, and young, as well as smart and dumb.

I suggest, ‘One of a Kind’, skip the victim hood of “this is harassment; she should pay me for copying my style, etc.”  Part of me almost thinks this is a HOAX Dear Abby letter.

Here is my two-point advice.  One. Keep a second outfit in the trunk of your car, and change if you think you look like a duplicate. Two. Go out and buy some nice new clothes, not from the fashion house that you both work in.  Obese is probably getting her clothes on discount just like you are.

Or, simply use humor when you show up at work and you think you are looking at your fashion twin, by saying, “Oh, you look fabulous, just like me.”