October 14, 2018 – “How do you know how to do that?”

         My actions or my self-boasting of a recent or in-process project often receives that question. From the wide spectrum of things I do or accomplish for instance - from elegant food and dining to making home-made raspberry jam - the above phrase falls on my ears often.

         Recently, The Family Circle, magazine arrived.  Magazines are not what they used to be – more commercials for prescriptions and this issue has almost half of it devoted to children’s toys advertisements. Touting itself as the Holiday Issue the cover has a collection of pies on the front [which some looked like the crust edges were overcooked and probably bitter tasting.]

         Now they have thinner paper that you have to wet your fingers to pry apart and so-called articles that are closer in length to a Twitter message than an essay, but they pass themselves off as a monthly magazine. 

         In the old days, not that long ago, you could entertain yourself for an entire rainy afternoon just reading all the articles. Often the articles ran from page to page to page. These days hardly any run over to a second page.  Short and concise – they leave me wanting for more meat and potatoes, not just the first-course salad depth they have these days.

         More often than not, they suggest you go on line to a “.com” for further information.  Which makes me wonder why do I subscribe to a magazine that refers me to the internet.  If I am connected to the internet – I don’t need “printed matter”.  Maybe the magazine publishers miss the point – there are still some of us out here in the world that want to hold a magazine in their hands and read something. Or, perhaps the magazine publishers think we only subscribe so that once a month we can roll the magazine up to start a cozy fire in our fireplace.

         Oops – I went off point!

         What caught my attention was the helpful article [I believe directed] to new homemakers - How to prepare for Thanksgiving dinners.  They shouted out – get out your crystal and china – which is just the opposite of what we have heard for the last 20 years . . . solo cups, Dixie plates and quality Vanity Fair napkins have been touted as the norm.

         Do young homemakers even have good stuff?  Do they own linen napkins and chafing dishes . . . I honestly doubt it . . . unless their Mom gifted items to them or instilled in them to own such things.

         The article that really caught my attention was the proper way to wash your crystal, china, and silver after a big shindig.

         Hand wash, hot water: How to wash the crystal first, then the silver ware, then what next, etc.,   And, for you to drain the dirty water and refill with fresh when you need to.  GOSH – all common sense – I thought everyone knew what order “dishes” were supposed to be hand washed.  Part of me smiled and thought, what not use the dishwasher?  EEE-GADS – how old fashioned. What they are graduating from disposables?

         But, maybe I am wrong.  I didn’t happen to notice any caution about putting dishes with gold rims in the dishwasher as the “reason” for all this hand washing.  I would have thought losing the gold off your expensive china would be the number one reason to hand wash dishes. 

         But, I guess the magazine takes for granted that every bride discovers that the hard way – by ruining her best china the first time it is used. [Unless of course, she had a woman in her life that told her the dynamics of gold trim dishes and not using a dishwasher.]

         When I have fancy – upscale – gatherings and actually use my dishes with the gold edges, I always get more offerings of “I’ll help you wash up.”  I politely, and instantly say, “No thank you.  I wash my dishes a special way.”

         Sometimes that remark solicits a wonderful smile that implies, “Great, I am off the hook – I hate dish washing” with the opposite end of the spectrum, a counter-offer of:  “I’ll help you load the dishwasher.” 

         The latter remark usually gets a toss of my hair [my friends and foes know what I mean by that] and I reply, “These dishes are hand-washed – the dishwasher would ruin the gold trim.”

         That remark makes half of them look down at the plate they have just eaten from for the first time during my elegant dinner party to see if there actually is a gold trim.  Those downward glances are marked in my mental notebook for future reference under the column “Don’t waste your time being elegant – they want their bellies filled, not their souls filled with beauty.”

         No, I am not being harsh. No, I wasn’t raised a Blue Blood in Manhattan, and no, I am not a rich-bitch snob. I come from a simple country background. We wore our best to church, and when we had company, the best of whatever we had was used.

         When I was a teenager, I immediately bought into the House Beautiful and Architectural Design glossy magazines that show cased elegant homes and elegant living and dining. I admit half my life I’ve aspired to have and do as portrayed in those magazines of old.

         So, when I read The Family Circle articles and noticed a sudden paradigm shift from paper plates to fine china – I paid attention.  Is it because our economy is suddenly busting its seams with more jobs, a higher stock market, and lower unemployment?  It is it that or it is cyclical – like fashion comes back around every 20 years? Or is it simply a matter that food tastes better on a china plate at a sit down affair than from a foam plate standing up or leaning against a wall?

         I read the magazine from cover to cover in record time, as I don’t read the prescription medicine advertisements that are sometimes two to three pages now.  I tore out a recipe I doubt I will use, but I can’t seem to break that built in save-a-good recipe mentality, and tossed the magazine in the recycle bin. 

Half of me smiled to myself with the knowledge that “bring out the good china” is now in fashion. The other half of me smiled smugly to myself that I already knew how to wash the good stuff as I am “a wisdom keeper”. [Wisdom keeper is a term that my Mom discovered about 20 years ago and shared with me upon the return from a Senior Citizens luncheon].

This wisdom keeper just pulled a gold-rimmed china mug out of the china cabinet for her morning coffee.  I am now at the age I no longer save the good stuff – I use it daily.