July 30, 2018 – Found an old TO-DO list

         Rummaging around in a drawer earlier today, I found an index card that was dog-eared and worn from sliding back and forth in the bottom of a seldom- used junk drawer.  This junk drawer has extra office supplies – pens, pencils, pre-inked office stamps for “paid”, “file”, or “closed” and the like.  It might all come in handy someday if I ever jump into a new business.  Right now, it is just a bit of clutter and I thought I would straighten it up while I was looking for something that I did not find.

         I was about to toss the dog-eared index card out when I flipped it over and was surprised it was not a blank card but a list, one of my TO-DO lists.  My handwriting was neat and precise in royal blue pen with little boxes waiting to be checked off when I completed the items.

         I went down the list and discovered several items had been checked off, but I couldn’t tell how old the list was. I remember painting the mudroom ceiling and also removing the shrubs from around the well house a few years back.  But, also on that list were two items that have been on many of my TO-DO lists since this one that was lost for years and they are still not DONE.

         Every spring I put “repaint the black outdoor railings” on my TO-Do list.  I look at those needing-paint railings every time I pause carrying in groceries to put two bags in one hand so that I can put the key into the door.  Mentally I say, yes, I need to do that and usually find an adequate excuse. It is too hot, too cold, too humid, or it is raining.  Often I have even gone as far as getting out the brush and the can of paint that has been bought for the project and locating a few drop cloths to tuck over the brick steps so black paint won’t be splashed and setting them out to remind me of the project.

         Then, life happens and I set it all back in the cupboard or closet and the project stays on my TO-DO list for weeks until I lose that TO DO list and start a fresh one.

         The other undone item is re-finish the round Rock Maple drop leaf table.  Yes, I have been setting out the brand new sander I purchased for that on a rotating basis every time I clean my closet and it too gets put away when life happens.  The table is in the kitchen now.  I switch the round table with the rectangle one every six months or so depending on my needs.  I wanted more walking room in the kitchen so I moved the table several months ago.

         Good – it is in the right place to work on it.  It is hot and sticky outside and going to rain for the next few days – Good – nice inside job.  The last time I put the brand new sander away I had purchased drop cloths for the project. Good, I am ready to work any minute!

         Isaiah Hankel, recently suggested that if you have ever watched the same movie twice, you are basically wasting time [my take on it].  My choice this afternoon was watch another TCM movie that I’ve already seen, or do something productive.  I went with productive – the table project.

Note: Isaiah Hankel is a motivational coach and one of his Friday Hard Hits emails drove home a theory about time or energy.  Here is a snippet from his Friday Hard Hits dated June 29, 2018.  [I added the italics.] His website is:

https://www.isaiahhankel.com/protect-your-mental-energy-and-achieve-success.

Isaiah Hankel made the following comment:

"A lot of people think that money is the most important asset that you have.  Money's helpful, but it's not the most important thing.  You can always earn more money if you have enough energy to do so.  Something else that a lot of people say is their most valuable asset is time.  They think, "Oh, I just need more time to do this."  But, if you've ever watched the same movie twice, you know that time is not your  most valuable asset, either.  Very often, we have a lot of time but not enough energy.  We're exhausted, we're tired, we're stretched too thin.  And, the question a lot of people ask themselves is, "What if I could just get some more time?" But really, you should be asking yourself, "What if I could just get some more energy so that I could do as much as somebody else does in 3 hours, in a few minutes?" That's the power of energy."

Decision made, I turned the TV from a movie to light classical music, my husband went out to mow the lawn, and I rummaged in the closet and brought out the brand new electric sander.  I re-read the directions and started in on the project.  It didn’t take long for me to not be impressed with the new equipment and I grabbed an unused sponge and wrapped a piece of sand paper around it and started in on sanding the maple table my way, the old fashioned way, a comfortable easy way for me. 

The table shows the wear and tear of 30 years.  There are dents here and there [from dropped tomato sauce or soup cans spilling out of grocery bags probably], a long deep groove from the bottom of my rolling computer suitcase that got away from me one day – slipped out of my hand, not set down properly but skidding across creating a long gouge.  And, that strange red mark that showed up when mail was tossed on the table when it wasn’t dry and I never could lift it from the finish no matter what cleaning product I tried.

Yes, I can admire each one of those flaws that it now possesses.  Some people call it patina and consider that valuable.  At this moment in my life, I don’t.  It has had 30 years or so of my life’s nicks, scratches and gouges.  I want a fresh slate. I want a gleaming mirror finish.

I put my back into it, like my Daddy did when he refinished something working in his cellar.  Yes, a rocking motion, back and forth.  Yes, I have my reading glasses on so that I can see every imperfection in the center section.

The varnish slowly comes off stroke by stroke. Slowly the wood is sanded into dust particles. A scratch here, a dent there slowly dissolve under the presser of the sand paper’s grit.  Even in air conditioning, I am working up a sweat.  It feels good to lean over and stretch my whole body and rock back and forth listening to the rasp of the sand paper gently gnawing at the wood finish.  Yes, another little scratch gone, another little dent gone; I will move to another section.

This is going to take some time I realize when I get to that long 14 to 16 inch groove from the computer case.  I really put my back into it and eventually even that disappears into fine dust.  The rest of that grove is on one of the drop leaves, I will work on that section tomorrow.

Doing it by hand, the old-fashioned way, listening to classical music doesn’t seem like work, it is actually pleasure and gives me time to think.

         I’ve mentally transcended all of the “drama” of a recent event into the nicks and scratches and gouges of my kitchen table. Re-finishing this table with be therapeutic.  Yes, as the imperfections disappear into dust, so will the pain of the recent drama.  I’ll be ready for another 30 years of life; ready to accumulate the nicks, scratches and gouges of failure, disappointment, or drama. Ready with a mirror finish.