Don’t you sometimes wish someone would say to you –

January 14, 2020 – Don’t you sometimes wish someone would say to you –

         “You are amazing, precious, wonderful, sparkling, miraculous, special, and uniquely you!”

         WOW – what a compliment that would be – but then – would I believe it?  No, I’d probably say, “How sweet of you, but I am far from that.”

         Do you notice that you never just accept a compliment?  A compliment is a “gift” to you from a friend or stranger or business associate.  Why do we sully it by not being gracious?  Why do we do that?

         Dr. Terry Ledford recently wrote about this exact situation.  It was entitled “Disqualifying the positive” and you can find his website at www.TerryLedford.com.

         His articles are often in our local paper, The Daily Courier and when I see his picture with his name below it – I always take the time to read his article.

         He asks – do you react to a criticism the same way you react to a compliment?  WOW – good question. 

         He continues, “Most people replay, analyze and long remember criticism or failures. No so much with compliments.”

         He further says:  “Think of your self-esteem as a bank savings account.  When you internally recognize a positive attribute, an accomplishment or a success, you make a deposit.  When you experience a criticism, a weakness or a failure, you make a withdrawal.”

         Sit with that for a while.

         He continues: “When your withdrawals exceed your deposits, your self-esteem account becomes overdrawn.  Your “insufficient funds” notice may come in the form of depression, anxiety, helplessness, or loss of motivation.”

The full article is at:

 http://www.terryledford.com/?s=disqualifying+the+positive&submit=Search

         Me, I want a busting-the-seams self-esteem bank account to get me over the ‘dud’ ideas or projects that I try and fail at.  It gives me enough “capital” to pull myself up by the bootstraps and try again.

         Someone once told to me it is a sign of “grace” to accept a compliment.  If you don’t accept a compliment well, learn some grace – it’s good for you.  And, while you are at it – toss out honest compliments freely – it will make you feel good and you might become a “. . . rainbow to someone’s cloud.”